A race against time…

Dave has been racing against time today.

He arrived at the crack of dawn and removed our loo within the hour.  He then set about installing its replacement like a man possessed; anxious,  he informed me, to ‘get back on schedule’.

Once the toilet’s in,  the worst of things will be behind us, he says.  He asks if that’s a pun.  I tell him I’ve no idea, and we decide not to pursue the matter further.

The new loo installed, Dave set about more tiling, and then some painting.  The walls needed doing, and the ceiling, too.

Apparently, he’s scheduled to begin work on a loft conversion next Wednesday, so needs to have our job done and dusted by Tuesday at the latest.  He’s here till almost 8 o’clock, keen to make the bathroom ‘fit for purpose’ – or as fit as it can be, bearing in mind the floor is shot to pieces and must be replaced on Monday.

It’s hard to believe the job is almost over.

It’s also a relief.   I expect we’ll miss Dave, in his way.

Though possibly not for long.

Thought for the Day

‘It’s a funny old world.  A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.’   

W C Fields (1880-1946)


About Chester Crump

Chester J Crump has spent a lifetime in cheese. His company, CC Cheese Ltd, was voted Door to Door magazine’s ‘Smallest Retailer of the Year’ from 1985-2007. Cheddar Today described him as ‘Chester Crump, aged 45’, while the UK’s most successful broadsheet, The Daily Telegraph, has never mentioned him at all. In his spare time, and under a completely different name, Chester has written gags and sketches for a wide range of TV and radio shows both in the UK and mainland Europe (BBC1, ITV, S4C, Radio 2, Radio 4 and the World Service – among others). A published writer for children, teenagers and adults, he has also performed stand-up comedy across Yorkshire and, in 2011, at the Edinburgh Fringe. Ten years ago, he was rumoured to be the constant companion of Sarah Michelle Gellar – TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and, more recently, that girl out of EastEnders whose name no one can remember. When he’s not writing his blog, Chester attends second-hand hat conventions, and has what many believe to be the largest collection of used headgear in Yorkshire. He is married to a woman, and lives in a house. All the above is completely true – with the possible exception of the bits about cheese. And Buffy. And EastEnders. And hats.
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