I’m home from Cheese World, refreshed, exhilarated and ready for action.
Only a week away, but what a week it’s been!
Quite frankly, you haven’t lived till you’ve skied down Camembert Canyon, tackled the Red Leicester Run and ridden the world-famous Roquefort Rollercoaster. It has to be experienced to be believed.
I’ve never seen Mrs C so animated. Not even when she won ‘Pudding of the Year’ (cheesecake – naturally!) at the international WI ‘Plain Cooking Extravaganza’ 1993.
But enough of our fun. I’m back with you now, and it’s down to business…
According to a report in this morning’s Daily Mail (‘the paper that shoots from the hip’, so it knows a lethal weapon when it sees one), police in Lancashire tasered a blind man after mistaking his stick for a Samurai sword.
It seems our villain failed to stop, following a polite request from an armed officer to ‘stay where you are or I’ll shoot you’. Being blind, he feared he was under attack by a gun-toting thug, which, in the circumstances, I suppose he was.
Throwing caution to the wind, he scuttled off, at a brisk two miles an hour, leaving our hero trailing in his wake. Unable to keep pace with such a dramatic turn of speed, the officer had no choice but to open fire.
Stung in the rear by a cool 50,000 volts, our man was then jumped on, wrestled to the ground and securely ‘cuffed.
That’ll teach him to lose his sight, then think he can walk the streets unmolested, just because someone’s given him a stick.
I’m trying to think of something funny to say about this story but must, on this occasion, admit defeat. Sorry about that.
In the meantime…
This week’s spot the difference competition
Let’s be honest: which of us has not, in our time, beaten up a blind man under the impression he was a trained assassin sent to ‘take us out’? It would be wrong to poke fun at the police for such a simple error and I refuse to do so.
Thought for the Day
‘A holiday is something that turns someone who’s tired into someone who’s exhausted.’
King Ludwig II of Bavaria