All good things … and this blog, too

My blog is going into hibernation for the winter.

Sadly, though I’d like to keep going, pressure of work – and several other projects in the pipeline – have made me realise I can’t update as frequently as I’d like to.  If at all.

I may come back in the New Year and find you’ve all scarpered.  You’ll have made new friends and won’t even return my calls.  I hope not – I don’t have that many friends in the first place, so can’t afford to lose any of you.

Many thanks to everyone who’s been kind enough to follow, comment or at least not cross the road when they see me coming.

Those of you with blogs of your own (just about all of you!) – rest assured I shall pop in and see how you’re doing.  Probably more frequently than I do at present.

To end this lesson, here are a few extracts from a wonderful tome, Bizarre Books by Russell Ash and Brian Lake,  It’s a compendium of curiously named book titles.  I hope one or two of the following may raise a smile:

 Enid Blyton’s Gay Story Book (1946: a selection of tales including, The Three Sailors, Let’s Play Worms and That Tiresome Brownie)

Fishing for Boys (1961, J H Elliott)

Handbook for the Limbless (1922, Geoffrey Howson; published by The Disabled Society)

Scouts in Bondage (1930, Geoffrey Prout)

Fish Who Answer The Telephone (1937, Yury Petrovich Frolov)

Groping (1933, Naomi Ellington Jacob; it tells the story of one man’s ‘struggle against adversity and his final victory’)

Heroic Virgins (1977, Alfonso P Santos)

Catching a Cannon Ball (1923, Walter Brown Gibson)

Build Your Own Hindenburg (1983, Alan Rose)

Explosive Spiders and How to Make Them (1881, Boys’ Own Paper, John Scoffern)

Practical Infectious Diseases (1983, Richard D Meyer)

And, one increasingly close to my heart these days…

Old Age: Its Cause and Prevention (1912, Sanford Bennett)


Keep smiling!


Thought for the Day

‘As you know, I never repeat gossip – so please listen carefully the first time.’

Vlad the Impaler (1431-1476)


About Chester Crump

Chester J Crump has spent a lifetime in cheese. His company, CC Cheese Ltd, was voted Door to Door magazine’s ‘Smallest Retailer of the Year’ from 1985-2007. Cheddar Today described him as ‘Chester Crump, aged 45’, while the UK’s most successful broadsheet, The Daily Telegraph, has never mentioned him at all. In his spare time, and under a completely different name, Chester has written gags and sketches for a wide range of TV and radio shows both in the UK and mainland Europe (BBC1, ITV, S4C, Radio 2, Radio 4 and the World Service – among others). A published writer for children, teenagers and adults, he has also performed stand-up comedy across Yorkshire and, in 2011, at the Edinburgh Fringe. Ten years ago, he was rumoured to be the constant companion of Sarah Michelle Gellar – TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and, more recently, that girl out of EastEnders whose name no one can remember. When he’s not writing his blog, Chester attends second-hand hat conventions, and has what many believe to be the largest collection of used headgear in Yorkshire. He is married to a woman, and lives in a house. All the above is completely true – with the possible exception of the bits about cheese. And Buffy. And EastEnders. And hats.
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14 Responses to All good things … and this blog, too

  1. Chester,

    We’re going to miss you around here – you come up with some unusual posts. I do understand completely – it’s hard to keep up with my own blogs, along with life.


    • Hi Sunni,

      Thank you for your kind words. As you say, it’s not always easy – what with life to get on with, too. I hope I’ll be back, and I’ll certainly pop in and see what you’re getting up to from time to time.

      Take care,

      C 🙂

  2. Ankur Mithal says:

    Wonderful compilation.

    Ol’ Blyton would not have known how the usage of “gay” will change in half a century.

    And, on the last one, like another blogger commented recently, “don’t take old age too seriously. It soon ends. In death.”

    Hope you are able to get back soon.

    • Thank you, Ankur. As always – far too kind! I hope to be back at some point, but, in the meantime, I look forward to chuckling over your own blog posts.

      All the best,

      C 🙂

  3. Phil Latery-Bitm says:

    Noooo! I’m going to have to dig out my black outfit again. You’re like one of those tv programmes that pulls us in and then leaves us wanting more – good move. I look forward to the New Year Special. In the meantime, thanks for the memories. Loved your blog! Please come back soon.

    • You almost make me want to change my mind and stay! I look forward to the New Year Special, too. Let’s face it, at my age, I look forward to the New Year full stop.

      Thank you for your kind words. Don’t go away – and I’ll try to come back.

      C 🙂

  4. This is seriously bad news. And I came here looking for something to make me laugh.

    All I get is a mystery; what can possibly make you so busy in the winter months? I’m afraid the gossip, repeated or not, must be true; you’ve gone and signed up as one of Santa’s elves.

    Hope you’ll still be checking the comments as I’m still working on Chesterton’s Challenge.

    Have you checked out Dean’s site recently? I thought Bernard might have something to say about his iTombs. But I’ve got this horrible feeling that you are going to tell me that Bernard has emigrated to Outer Mongolia or Siberia or somewhere. Some country that has remote places with no internet access so he can’t take over this site for you while you are so busy stuffing all the wrong packages into unsuspecting kiddies’ stockings.

    • Too, too kind! (Keep going – that’s not a complaint!)

      I’m busy inventing a new type of cheese, so will be holed up in the lab for the next few months. None of this simple stuff – mixing cheddar with fruit and calling it ‘Fruity cheddar’. Other than that, I can say no more. If the Russians get wind of my plans, they’ll be in like a shot and market the stuff before it’s proved to be safe.

      Curiously, I did once dress up as Father Christmas at a children’s party – but an elf, never. I’m management – at least when Mrs C isn’t around.

      Good luck with Chesterton’s Challenge!

      I wouldn’t trust Bernard to take over this site. He’d sell it to the highest bidder and get drunk on the proceeds.

      Thanks for all your splendid comments over the past few months. Let us hope this is not the end.

      Keep up your own good work!

      C 🙂

  5. julielees says:

    I am deeply shocked at your news, even to the point of considering haranguing my local town hall into flying its flag at half-mast. Please come back in the New Year as your posts are so entertaining but in the meantime, I wish you good luck in all of your endeavours.

    • Many thanks, Julie. I appreciate your taking the time to comment, and for your kind remarks. Hope the town hall people don’t give you any trouble. If they do, let me know and I’ll send Bernard round to sort them out.

      I hope to be back!

      All the best,

      Chester 🙂

  6. Dean Gregory says:

    I can’t help but feel this is leading up to more fun and frivolity in the coming months. I’d hate to see this blog become inactive or something… I always look forward to seeing those emails showing me a new post is up.

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